I think most people are aware of the terrible story of 6 teens who died when the car they were in ran off the road and turned over in a shallow pond. There were 2 survivors of the 8 in the vehicle. The loss of a child is a horrific thing, womething no parent ever wants to experience, regardless of the age of the child. It is the natural order of things that we expect the parent to die before the child. The inversion of that takes away so much joy, so much savor of life. On a personal level, the death of a child is always a tragedy for the parent.
What is a tragedy? As defined by numerous dictionaries it is an event taht causes great distress of loss, or a play of a certain type. By that standard the death of those teens certainly was a tragedy. By such a definition a disaster may or may not be a tragedy, while a terrible personal loss is always a tragedy. But here we begin to enter the subtleties of English words. I have remarked on this in writing about poorly phrased headlines, such as 'Air Conditioner Plunges from East Side Window, Injures Woman'. I did not know that an AC unit could have intent, which is implied in the word plunge as opposed to fall or drop. The word tragedy carries with it the implication of a loss without personal responsibility. We use the word to describe accidents where a tornado kills, or where a plane explodes. What about when there is personal responsibility? Is that then a tragedy, or merely the consequence of personal choices and actions? And point of view matters as well. For the pilots who die by making judgment errors their death is a consequence of their acts, whereas the deaths of the passengers is tagic. If a truck driven by a drunk crushes a car, killing everyone, the death of the truck driver is hardly a tragedy. It is the consequence of highly irresponsible acts, while the deaths of those in the car is not simply a tragedy but a tort.
So what about these teens? The media told a typical story. Tragic death of 6 teens when car fkips over into lake. Quotes from devastated parents- they were good kids, friends, always together. Quotes from friends- they made people laugh, they were the life of the party. Community quotes- good students, active in (pick something worthy). Weather was not a factor. The clear implication left is taht these good, unblemished teens were cut down by a terrible, inexplicable accident. But in a couple of days the story started to change.
The accident happened at 6 AM. The car seated 5 and had 8 people in it. Then it turned out the car was reported stolen by the owner, who had no relationship to the families of the teens. No one was wearing a seat belt. The parents knew they 'had plans' but did not know what they were, where they were going or when they would be back. For children between 14 and 15 except for one age 18 and one age 19.
THAT story sounds very different. It doesn't take much to fill in the lines. Kids out late, too late. Doing whatever is done late- sex, drugs, alcohol. A rush to get home before the parents wake up to find out their children, age 14 to 15, had not even been home the night before. A car taken from a driveway where, like 40% of stolen vehicles, the keys had been left inside. Cramming themselves into the vehicle and racing down the road to beat the early morning sun, no seatbelts, stuffed into the seats, darkness. And then the accident.
The loss to the aprents will always be tragic. But this story is not. There are too many personal choices involved, for both children and parents. What parent lets their minor child out without knowing their plans and having clear lines about the time fo their return. And everyone carries a cell phone. At what point did the parents worry? 11:00? Midnight? 1:00 AM? Why did not these good kids call Mom and Dad to say 'I'm in trouble'? What kind of relationship allows this ignorance and lack of confidence? And what upstanding citizens resolve a problem by stealing a car?
The death of the young is always sad, and a horrible loss to the parents. But none of this story sounds like a tragedy. It sounds like lousy parenting, lousy choices, and horrific but unsurprising consequences. Perhaps there would be less of them if the media and our society, instead of saying it is a tragedy would articulate some values and standards and say what it is- horrible but a natural consequence of bad choices and bad behavior.
Ted
What is a tragedy? As defined by numerous dictionaries it is an event taht causes great distress of loss, or a play of a certain type. By that standard the death of those teens certainly was a tragedy. By such a definition a disaster may or may not be a tragedy, while a terrible personal loss is always a tragedy. But here we begin to enter the subtleties of English words. I have remarked on this in writing about poorly phrased headlines, such as 'Air Conditioner Plunges from East Side Window, Injures Woman'. I did not know that an AC unit could have intent, which is implied in the word plunge as opposed to fall or drop. The word tragedy carries with it the implication of a loss without personal responsibility. We use the word to describe accidents where a tornado kills, or where a plane explodes. What about when there is personal responsibility? Is that then a tragedy, or merely the consequence of personal choices and actions? And point of view matters as well. For the pilots who die by making judgment errors their death is a consequence of their acts, whereas the deaths of the passengers is tagic. If a truck driven by a drunk crushes a car, killing everyone, the death of the truck driver is hardly a tragedy. It is the consequence of highly irresponsible acts, while the deaths of those in the car is not simply a tragedy but a tort.
So what about these teens? The media told a typical story. Tragic death of 6 teens when car fkips over into lake. Quotes from devastated parents- they were good kids, friends, always together. Quotes from friends- they made people laugh, they were the life of the party. Community quotes- good students, active in (pick something worthy). Weather was not a factor. The clear implication left is taht these good, unblemished teens were cut down by a terrible, inexplicable accident. But in a couple of days the story started to change.
The accident happened at 6 AM. The car seated 5 and had 8 people in it. Then it turned out the car was reported stolen by the owner, who had no relationship to the families of the teens. No one was wearing a seat belt. The parents knew they 'had plans' but did not know what they were, where they were going or when they would be back. For children between 14 and 15 except for one age 18 and one age 19.
THAT story sounds very different. It doesn't take much to fill in the lines. Kids out late, too late. Doing whatever is done late- sex, drugs, alcohol. A rush to get home before the parents wake up to find out their children, age 14 to 15, had not even been home the night before. A car taken from a driveway where, like 40% of stolen vehicles, the keys had been left inside. Cramming themselves into the vehicle and racing down the road to beat the early morning sun, no seatbelts, stuffed into the seats, darkness. And then the accident.
The loss to the aprents will always be tragic. But this story is not. There are too many personal choices involved, for both children and parents. What parent lets their minor child out without knowing their plans and having clear lines about the time fo their return. And everyone carries a cell phone. At what point did the parents worry? 11:00? Midnight? 1:00 AM? Why did not these good kids call Mom and Dad to say 'I'm in trouble'? What kind of relationship allows this ignorance and lack of confidence? And what upstanding citizens resolve a problem by stealing a car?
The death of the young is always sad, and a horrible loss to the parents. But none of this story sounds like a tragedy. It sounds like lousy parenting, lousy choices, and horrific but unsurprising consequences. Perhaps there would be less of them if the media and our society, instead of saying it is a tragedy would articulate some values and standards and say what it is- horrible but a natural consequence of bad choices and bad behavior.
Ted
Still tragic as the kids had the classic "Fatal Flaw" of poor choices and even worse - potentially poor parenting. We cannot even be sure their parenting was poor - kids have been known to lie to parents rather consistently. I think a lot of criminals, petty or horrific are tragic, that doesn't make them less culpable. Romeo is responsible for his suicide; these kids are responsible for their deaths; that is tragic.
ReplyDeleteGreat post - it forces us to think about values and responsibility. Thanks.