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Tacky

My wife and I went to Warehouse Row in Chattanooga for lunch today, and we looked at the stores in the complex. Much of the complex is now unused, a shame as much was spent on refurbishing it 22 years ago. Now it is home to stores that are not so much high end as expensive and pretentious. You can buy fancy shoes, fancy perfume and fancy home furnishings, none of which are worth the cost.

One store, which was a very expensive version of Pottery Barn, was selling vases for upwards of 1000.00. One store was selling French sheets, all separates. I asked how much for a King set- one fitted bottom, one flat top, two pillow shams. The total- 745.00. I was also informed that the French don't use top sheets (I didn't ask, but last time I was there they used Duvets), and so everything was separate. Well, I'll bet the French don't pay 745.00 for sheets either. I'll bet they have the equivalent of The Home Store, or JC Penney.

This store, selling sheets more marketable on Rodeo Drive, had a clerk more at home in a Burger King. She was frumpily dressed, coarse of speech, and to top it off was chewing gum. Oh yeah, I feel like having you scorch my credit card for Egyptian cotton French sheets. And this got me thinking about tackiness. There are several aspects to tacky, and it is by no means a phenomenon confined only to Burger King, etc. Tacky is found among he wealthy and the educated, but it is called pretentious for them.

And so, my list of tacky things, neither complete nor authoritative, but a snap shot of behaviors I think reflect poor manners-

-chewing gum
-chewing with mouth open
-smacking lips while chewing
-brand name clothing (nice paying to be an ad, isn't it, or do you really care about the maker?)
-exposed bra straps under strap tops
-exposed whale tails
-pants below umbilicus in men
-pants showing camel toes in women
-slouching
-overdressing for informal events
-dressing like a cliché but thinking you're cool (hear this Abercrombie and Fitch ads)
-liking ANYTHING by Miley Cyrus
-imitating pop 'stars'
-using ghetto slang if you are white and a HS grad
-finger signs for 'call me'
-singing or acting out triumphal songs for trivial acts
-telling everyone the type of wine you drink, or the type of Scotch
-bumper stickers for anything
-little family decals with children and pets
-wearing gym clothes or workout clothes anywhere when shopping or going to a restaurant
-sneakers and sport coats. You do NOT look cool. You look like a moron
-facial piercings
-multiple visible tattoos if you are a HS grad
-talking about your psychiatrist
-telling people how much money you earn

That will do.

The world is filled with tacky people. And none is tackier than a gum chewing, ill-spoken clerk in a store trying to sell 700.00 sheet sets. The first is tacky. The second is a pretentious rip-off. Wow, a double....

Ted

Comments

  1. Elizabeth NelsonOctober 19, 2013 at 6:26 PM

    And I laughed!! As far as sheets go I will say Ralph Lauren are pretty nice and you can get them discounted at places like Marshall's.But no sheets are worth 750.00!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Patsy StairOctober 28, 2013 at 9:28 PM

    Love it! But must confess that I have 2 little tacky skeletal westies on the back window of my SUV to match my tacky personalized license plate that reads "WESTI2D" (westitu
    de is a term we westie owners use to describe our terriers' personalties.)

    ReplyDelete

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