I watch people talking and texting on cell phones. Our phones (my phone) now have internet and e-mail access. The advantages for business are obvious. There is immediate availability and responsivity. I'm not so sure about personal interaction and communication.
Most of us have seen people labelled as 'bag ladies' or 'vent man'. These are most typically chronic schizophrenics. They 'talk' or babble or quack to themselves as they walk down the street.
People with ear buds and cell phones look just the same way. They are talking out loud to someone and something that no one can see. They are quite brazen, or perhaps unaware, about inflicting their conversations on others in stores and sidewalks (mercifully most people are much better about theaters). At the gym, many people have the ipods on their arms, with ear buds in, sweatily oblivious to others.
We also seem to feel quite urgent about cell phones. We answer them in the middle of personal conversations, in offices, while being interviewed by doctors, in checkout lines. Depending on the situation, I have watched people paying for groceries while cheerfully talking with another person. In my office, virtually every call that is answered is dealt with the same way. The caller is told in hushed, hoarse terms 'I'm at the doctor's- I can't talk right now.'
All these phones identify the caller. Doesn't the person see it is not their child, or the car repair shop, or whatever? They also have messaging service, so that a caller can leave a message.
It seems to me that social interactions are greatly curtailed by everyone's connection to cell phones. The snub administered to conversation partners when a phone is answered is small, but repeated and painful. The put down to the grocery clerk as a person pays for groceries while talking to someone else is subtle but clear. The message we send to our surroundings as we talk into a mouthpiece walking down the street is 'I really don't care where I am'.
What a paradox that devices intended to increase access and communication have the unintended result of reducing contact with our surroundings and other people. We interact with our friends and co-workers instantly and constantly, at the expense of our environment. We administer subtle but brutal snubs to everyone we are with when we dive for our cell phones and chat away.
James Thurber was being interviewed near the end of his life, and his phone began to ring. The interviewer finally said "Do you want to get that?" Thurber replied "No. That instrument exists for my convenience."
Indeed. We forget that our instruments of convenience can impose themselves on our consciousness and behavior. There is nothing about a ringing phone that compels us to answer it in conditions that hurt, snub and ignore others and our surroundings.
Ted
Most of us have seen people labelled as 'bag ladies' or 'vent man'. These are most typically chronic schizophrenics. They 'talk' or babble or quack to themselves as they walk down the street.
People with ear buds and cell phones look just the same way. They are talking out loud to someone and something that no one can see. They are quite brazen, or perhaps unaware, about inflicting their conversations on others in stores and sidewalks (mercifully most people are much better about theaters). At the gym, many people have the ipods on their arms, with ear buds in, sweatily oblivious to others.
We also seem to feel quite urgent about cell phones. We answer them in the middle of personal conversations, in offices, while being interviewed by doctors, in checkout lines. Depending on the situation, I have watched people paying for groceries while cheerfully talking with another person. In my office, virtually every call that is answered is dealt with the same way. The caller is told in hushed, hoarse terms 'I'm at the doctor's- I can't talk right now.'
All these phones identify the caller. Doesn't the person see it is not their child, or the car repair shop, or whatever? They also have messaging service, so that a caller can leave a message.
It seems to me that social interactions are greatly curtailed by everyone's connection to cell phones. The snub administered to conversation partners when a phone is answered is small, but repeated and painful. The put down to the grocery clerk as a person pays for groceries while talking to someone else is subtle but clear. The message we send to our surroundings as we talk into a mouthpiece walking down the street is 'I really don't care where I am'.
What a paradox that devices intended to increase access and communication have the unintended result of reducing contact with our surroundings and other people. We interact with our friends and co-workers instantly and constantly, at the expense of our environment. We administer subtle but brutal snubs to everyone we are with when we dive for our cell phones and chat away.
James Thurber was being interviewed near the end of his life, and his phone began to ring. The interviewer finally said "Do you want to get that?" Thurber replied "No. That instrument exists for my convenience."
Indeed. We forget that our instruments of convenience can impose themselves on our consciousness and behavior. There is nothing about a ringing phone that compels us to answer it in conditions that hurt, snub and ignore others and our surroundings.
Ted
Amen !! There is nothing more irritating than the "Cell phone in the restaurant" guy (or girl). I don't think that anyone is that important - of course, most, if not all, the conversations are decidedly NOT of any great consequence - i.e. pick up milk, did you see her dress, i broke up with my significant other, ad nauseum. All of which does not concern any of us one bit. I don't want to know a stranger's business, or love life.
ReplyDeleteWith regards to what these instruments do to our children - we are bringing up an entire generation of socially-stunted people. They can't talk to each other, let alone talk to an adult. Limited social skills at best. And, texting is not the same as a conversation with a living, breathing human.
I feel better now.......
A coworker of mine told me that in these teenagers and early twenty somethings, using a phone while with a group of friends is not considered rude. You often see four or five girls sitting together chatting with someone else or texting on the phone. Parents allowed this behavior when they were teens, and I just can't stand it. We have to instill values about social etiquette and general consideration of others. My girls are too young for cell phones, but I lead by the example, no driving and talking unless necessary, no family time and chatting unless necessary, no ignoring the checkout person in the store to chat, nothing is that important. And if it's an emergency, well...you won't be in that checkout line for long! I had a 6 hour flight twice last week, and it was so completely peaceful, I didn't even bother to turn my phone back on between flights.
ReplyDelete